My Statement.

In the second line of his song Here is our King, David Crowder writes “from wherever searching comes”. I recently began living with a group of guys. We’ve made it our purpose to live as an intentional community, meaning we want to be committed to being a part of each other’s lives and the life of our surrounding community. We want to intentionally pursue this idea of a Jesus lifestyle. The pursuit of this goal has led to multiple conversations about our lives. During my story, evolution naturally comes up. It was the catalyst of my anguish during college. I found myself believing evolution; a theory I had been told was a lie and it flipped my worldview on its head.

I met with a friend the other day. She is currently posing every possible question to God and flirting with: “if evolution can work sans God…then what reason do we have to believe in God?” We had a three hour conversation that Tuesday morning. It was refreshing, in that I recognized a part of me in her: the desire to constantly question. I saw in her the desire to search until satisfied; until the answer makes sense. But I also saw the confusion those questions bring forth. Why would God place things in creation to discredit his existence? Even more pointedly, why should I be able to recognize such things?

Those questions made that mid-morning conversation refreshing, yes, but also frustrating. It was frustrating because I still struggle when it comes to the answers. Even with some of the most basic questions like “how do we reconcile the necessity of death in regards to evolution with the idea that death is a punishment according to Christianity”, give me answers with which I struggle. Yet the more I discuss and learn about the mechanisms of this world the more I see beauty behind its structures. And as Miche continued to ask questions I started to see something. I began to realize that the more I see surrounding the certainty of evolution the more I begin to question the validity of what I have been taught about religion. The one truth I cannot get beyond is the sovereignty of God and his desire to be in a relationship with his creation. Not just with us. That and God rarely outright reveals himself. In fact, it seems as if he relishes placing his creation in a place of skeptical belief; giving us just enough to either see him in creation or discredit him through creation. Therefore, if logic holds (hopefully it does), then God must be hinted at in the laws behind the universe. Just as a crafter is hinted at when one looks at a table. But to prove or disprove him based on creation is impossible. He is not creation, just as a steel table is only remotely related to its organic creator.

The questions I still have, those which find religion contesting against science, are arbitrary. I don’t worship religion, and I won’t sell my life to theology. Science, although not 100% accurate all the time, still answers related questions in a more concrete way than an 8000 year old multicultural legend. My view is this: God created everything we can study, and in it he placed laws which, with or without direct measurable intervention from him, will continue to create. New bacteria, new plants, new animals, new planets and new solar systems, and even an ever expanding universe, are happening because God wants them to, yes, but these new creations happen through laws which, by themselves, create. This ambiguity, laws which create by themselves but possibly through the will of a creator, places us in a unique position. It allows us to point towards a creator, using concrete ideas found in science, but it also allows others to point towards a self-sustaining system; keeping the idea of God, yet again, open to interpretation. Something he seems to enjoy just a bit too much.

David Crowder continues the line of thought he began at the beginning of this essay with “…the look itself, a trace of what we’re looking for”. God wants us to search. He wants us to ask the hard questions; otherwise why would they be there (well, that is assuming God is real)? Those questions, so far, have not given me any reason to disavow my belief in God and I doubt they will. I believe God relishes the complexity, beauty, and at times inefficiency of what he created. He sees it as a wonderful expression of who he is. Maybe we should too?